Who do I think I am, believing I can accomplish great things? I come from a middle class family. I didn’t learn about money or have fancy things growing up. My parents provided for me the best they could with what they had.
So, when I dream of big things, I’m often left doubting myself. When I was in a toxic marriage I was seriously unhappy with, I just assumed I’d stay there and be miserable for the rest of my life. I’d do the best I could with what I had. I’d live my life, try to get by, raise my sons, try to stay out of the way and when I could- enjoy myself, be happy, and find joy.
Seriously? What was I thinking?
Why didn’t I believe I deserved to be happy?
Limiting belief.
Imposter syndrome.
The belief that good things were meant for other people, not me. I was unworthy of them. That other people were happy and successful because they deserved it.
What was I doing to deserve it?
I was barely holding it together. I was managing my anxiety with food. I was unhappy. I didn’t feel like I was doing anything successful in my life. I was using all my energy trying to micromanage someone else and save them from themselves.
I don’t know exactly when I woke up. Maybe the years of counseling finally gave me clarity. Maybe the fact that my home life was out of control and there were things happening that I ABSOLUTELY did not feel good about happening in my home.
When you start to remove negative things from your life, you make room for the good things, the things you do want in your life.
But those thoughts are still there. The ones that tell me I don’t deserve success. The ones that tell me my dreams are beyond my reach. That I am not worthy.
Can I share my BIG DREAMS with you?
I want to be able to do a handstand
At 43. I couldn’t even do one when I was 16. But damn it, I want to be freaking strong enough to do a handstand. To me, a handstand embodies physical strength and power. As I type this, tears well up in my eyes because just thinking about achieving that goal holds feelings of immense pride being able to accomplish it.
I want to build a business
A successful one. A business surrounding my friends, my supporters, my audience, the people looking to me as an example of hope and empowerment. I want to build a business around people looking to take their lives and what they’ve learned and make it better, achieve more, and know that they are worthy of great things too.
I want to buy my dream home.
Everyone has a dream home. Mine is a house in the country with a big porch on lots of land. Land my boys can explore, a big open field where they can play ball without the ball rolling into the road, or ride 4 wheelers, while my chickens roam free. And I want to be able to buy that house. ME.
What I know today that I didn’t acknowledge before is that it’s going to take work. Dreams take work. My dreams. Your dreams. If you want to accomplish them, they’re going to take some effort and dedication.
Make a plan
Take action
If you have a dream or a vision of where you want your life to be in one year, figure out what small steps you can take over the next few months that will get you closer to that goal. If you are consistently take small action, it will add up over time( read my blog post on BABY STEPS HERE).
I’m sure there are going to be some bumps along the way. Probably some failure too. Scratch that. There’s absolutely going to be failure. But if we want these big dreams to come true, we have to endure. We have to take those failures, learn from them, make adjustments and keep going.
Because I am worthy of achieving my BIG DREAMS and you are too.
*If you want a safe space to work on those dreams, join my private Facebook group Small Steps, Big Dreams where you’ll get a free workbook to help you reach those big dreams you have!
